Are you sure you are doing it the right way? Here are four reasons your girlfriend is faking orgasm.
*Photo used for illustrative purpose*
From embarrassment to fatique and many more, here are four reasons why your girlfriend is always faking orgasm as explained by s*x and relationship expert, Dr Pam Spurr.
Embarrassment
Many women don’t want to admit they find it difficult to climax because it makes them feel ‘unwomanly’ (they shouldn’t feel embarrassed, btw).
There’s lots of pressure to seem like an easily aroused, s*x-vixen. Not making a partner feel that sex with you is as technical as instructions for complicated machinery!
Top tips
Time to change that mind-set from being embarrassed to self-acceptance. She should talk herself up that it’s ‘okay’ she needs particular types of stimulation.
Then during foreplay she can turn it into flirty fun making suggestions that work for her.
And make it a little game, giving each other permission to take turns suggesting new techniques. When it’s her turn she suggests what actually does the trick.
Fatigue
Many just want to get s*x over with because they’re so tired. Faking speeds it up. Even if their partner’s technique is good they don’t have the energy.
Top tips:
Come clean that exhaustion’s killing your sexual desire. Plus guys need to be aware! She’s likely to be tired if she’s, e.g., juggling work and motherhood so help out.
Coax her into sensual massage. Undress her slowly, telling her you’ll do all the ‘work’. Then let your fingers ‘accidentally’ glide across her nipples or slide over her pubic mound. Her previously too-tired desire will rear its head.
Concern for his feelings
His technique ranks with having her erogenous zones fiddled with by an electric toothbrush – no finesse! He hasn’t a clue and she doesn’t want to hurt his feelings.
Top tips:
Guys, always ask what feels good to her. Don’t assume you know. Or you might end up with a ‘faker’, silently sparing your feelings. And ladies guide his hands to where you want to be touched. Say in a warm, sensual tone you’d like him to stroke you there gently (or firmly, if you prefer!). Ditto, if he’s kissing or licking you.
She’s never had an orgasm, full stop
One sexology study suggests 11% of women have never had an orgasm. Although some studies find a smaller percentage. But in these cases usually a woman simply doesn’t know how her body works. So she doesn’t know how to show him to satisfy her.
Top tips:
Self-pleasure leads to self-knowledge! Lie back somewhere comfortable, relax and gently touch and tease yourself. Try using a vibrator for stimulation. Once you learn what arouses you, share that knowledge with him.
If you’ve any doubts about why you don’t orgasm check with your GP.
Dr Pam’s Position: The CAT
Perfect for the woman who finds reaching climax tricky. Women get great results if they’re on top, like a ‘reverse’ Missionary position. He lies on his back and she gets on! She wriggles a centimetre or two up on his pubic bone. She can then ‘grind’ her clitoris against it as gently/firmly as she wants during s*x. Satisfaction guaranteed!
Call Dr Pam on Talk Radio with any dilemma on Saturday nights from 9 PM to midnight. PLEASE put Talk Radio logo and contact number here, thanks
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